I'm Just Sayin'

I’ve had several conversations recently about happiness. I know several people who are wrestling with the word and the concept. I struggle too, but I think I have come to terms with what it means to be happy. As a writer, I feel compelled to share my insights with you. (And, yes, I am fully aware of how happy that makes you, the reader. Not happy? Step off. No hard feelings. Open, but cautious? Read on, my people! Blindly accepting? Seriously, why are you even here?)

But here is where I found my answers: in the reality of everyday life, in the pure and simple gestures of people that I call my friends, in the common bonds of blood and tears and human endeavor. I realized there are people who actually want to be happy and others who don’t. There are those who cultivate  happiness, and others who seek to kill it at its roots. I think I’ve learned to identify those on either end of the happiness spectrum, and to chart those, like me, who land somewhere in the middle.

A friend (in life and on Facebook) posted that she is going to take up running to honor her late mother by participating in Disney's Tinkerbell Half Marathon. Since I myself took up running a few short months ago, and like my friend, I carry around more than my share of womanly wonderfulness, I thought she might benefit from my recent experience.

So, here are my tips for big girls on the go. Some are serious and some are less serious. I hope you can tell the difference.

1. Understand that you are going to sweat. A lot. And smell bad. And your mascara is going to run, even if you buy the most expensive waterproof stuff.

2. If you insist on trying to look cute when you run, go ahead and get some special outfits, in colors that don't clash with red, because your face is going to turn beet red with exertion. Don't forget matching hair scrunchies.

3. Get some Pat Benatar music on your iTunes. She's very empowering. I recommend "Invincible."

4. Buy the best shoes you can afford, but realize that you are going to have to replace them frequently. They are going to take a beating.

5. Invest in some reusable ice packs. I need them for bad knees. You will probably need them for those dainty little ankles of yours. And some Alleve. And muscle soak crystals for the bath.

6. Start out on a soft, level surface, like a track. It's much easier on the joints, which are already working harder than they want to. Eventually you can transition to street running if you are not paranoid about motorists wisecracking about your ass ...

7. Wear some big shades. So even if motorists are making fun of your ass, they won't know it's you.

8. Start with walking, then add short bursts of running. I think it actually is pretty effective for calorie burning and metabolism boosting. Gradually increase your running bursts and your total distance.

9. You might be tempted to run with a buddy. I don't recommend it. You will want to chat and gossip with your pal, and you just can't do that and run. Not yet anyway. Trust me. Ask my friend Stacy about the Children's Miracle Network 5K... We caught up with our lives, but not with the runners ahead of us ...

10. Stretch, stretch, stretch...and hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. By the way, wine is not particularly effective for hydration. Voice of experience.

11. On your off days, try some leg-strengthening exercises like leg presses, squats and lunges. It will help keep your muscles loose and support your joints.

That's enough to get you started, my friend. See ya on the roads, but don't you dare talk smack about my ass ...

Washington D.C. is probably not Emerald City, but this campaign of 2012 is feeling a lot like the Yellow Brick Road.

I recently signed on as a volunteer for the Elisabeth Motsinger for Congress campaign, and joined a small but steadfast band of down-to-earth dreamers who are determined that North Carolina will be represented by a woman who shares our values: equal access to affordable healthcare; opportunities for quality public education; a growing economy in a thriving natural environment; protecting human rights and ending discrimination in all its forms.

I will not cast myself as Dorothy, and I dare not assign roles to my colleagues on the campaign trail. But I will say this: unlike L. Frank Baum’s beloved characters in The Wizard of Oz, we already know that we have everything we need. We need not search for Scarecrow’s brain, because our candidate has the intelligence she needs to make the right decisions for North Carolina. Tin Man’s heart? Got it. Elisabeth Motsinger has shown remarkable compassion through her work as a physician’s assistant, her service on the School Board, and her activism on social and environmental issues. Courage? Forget about it, Cowardly Lion. When the local paper endorsed her opponent in the primary, Elisabeth replied, “I would like to thank the Winston-Salem Journal for noticing that I am an activist for liberal causes. My actions are firmly grounded in my moral vision and I make no apologies for standing fast.” The campaign staff was spitting nails, but our candidate showed us back bone and calm, reasoned courage of conviction.

And Dorothy’s fervent desire to find her way home? Elisabeth has the vision to restore the American dream. “I believe in real prosperity for real people,” she says. “America should be the land of opportunity for everyone. Our society can make sure that the generations that follow us inherit an America where dreams can still be achieved.”

In the Wizard of Oz, the Good Witch Glinda told Dorothy that she only had to believe to find her way home. Elizabeth Motsinger believes in America, and I believe in Elisabeth. And we all know who is the Wicked Witch of the West.

Just sayin.

The Komen Foundation is engaged in the doo-doo dance. You know, when you step in a pile of dog poop and then you scuff around trying to get the crap off your shoes. It ain’t pretty. It’s almost impossible to do it gracefully. And if you do manage to clean your shoes, you’re still left with a pile of shit in your yard.

That’s what I thought when I studied today’s statement, in which Komen supposedly reversed its decision to de-fund Planned Parenthood, and apologized for casting doubt on its commitment.

When I first read the statement, I felt triumphant. The angry and indignant outcry from hundreds of thousands of former Komen supporters had been heard! But then I read it again, and got a whiff of something stinky. After reading it several times, and mulling it over for a few hours, I’ve come to the conclusion that Komen still has poop on its shoes, and it might never get its yard cleaned up.

Today’s statement was very carefully worded to make me feel like I’d won. And, feeling warm and fuzzy with victory, I’d be more likely to forgive and forget. And in the spirit of forgiveness, perhaps I would reconsider my vow to de-fund Komen. After all, they changed their minds, so shouldn’t I change mine? Shouldn’t we all just get back to the business at hand – protecting women’s health?

In reality, the statement didn’t offer much. It said Komen would “continue to fund existing grants, including those of Planned Parenthood …” But they never said they would take money away from Planned Parenthood, just that they would not approve future grants. Stinky.

In today’s statement, Komen also pledged to “preserve their eligibility to apply for future grants.” Well, of course anyone can apply for a grant, but that doesn’t mean Komen would actually consider the application. Smelly.

And while Komen has repeatedly denied that its decision to de-fund Planned Parenthood was political, today’s statement clearly pointed the political finger at those who cried foul. “We urge everyone who has participated in this conversation across the country over the last few days to help us move past this issue. We do not want our mission marred or affected by politics - anyone's politics.” We weren’t playing politics with women’s health, but if you don’t return to the fold, your politics is getting in the way of our mission. Reeking.

Perhaps I am being too harsh. Maybe I am too bitter to see this objectively. Could be. But I won’t apologize for that. It’s too personal. The betrayal is still too fresh. And Komen has a long way to go to restore my faith and regain my trust. And in the meantime, I have found alternatives in my personal fight against breast cancer.

I have discovered Forsyth Medical Center Foundation. Donations to this organization can be earmarked for breast cancer screening and treatment at Forsyth Medical Center facilities for uninsured women in nine North Carolina counties. Through its Women’s Council, the foundation addresses a variety of women’s health issues, and it sponsors a mobile mammogram unit to provide on-the-spot screenings in remote and underserved areas. Donors can even request their gift be used specifically by WomanWise, the breast and cervical cancer prevention program administered by Forsyth County Department of Public Health, which has provided me with free mammograms for the past three years that I have been uninsured.

Each and every penny donated to the foundation goes directly to patient care, and there are volunteer opportunities for those with more time than money. For more information go to http://www.forsythmedicalcenter.org/ and click “ways to give.”

I’ve also been reacquainted with the Breast Cancer Research Foundation. Since 1936, BCRF has provided critical funding for research at leading medical centers worldwide, including Harvard, Yale, Duke, Johns Hopkins, the Mayo Clinic, Washington University in St. Louis, Stanford, UCLA, Oxford, and the University of London. More than 90 cents of every dollar donated goes directly to breast cancer research and awareness programs. For more information, see http://www.bcrfcure.org/index.html.

There is also the National Breast Cancer Foundation, created by a breast cancer survivor to promote early detection through screening, and to provide free mammograms to women in need. NBCF is highly rated as a charitable organization and has an impressive list of corporate and celebrity partners. See http://www.nationalbreastcancer.org/default.aspx.

Information about these organizations is provided as a resource, and is not an endorsement. Haven’t we all learned to do our homework? I am sure there are many worthy organizations that are dedicated to breast cancer awareness and prevention and are working to find a cure. I hope to pass along information as I find it, and I encourage my allies in this fight to share their information with me as well.

The Breast Cancer Research Foundation estimates that in the U.S. a woman dies of breast cancer roughly every 13 minutes. That means that more than 300 women have died in America while the Komen Foundation played politics with their lives.

That stinks. I’m just sayin.